a normal day

anyway goodmorning/afternoon/night depending what state ur minds are in. lol starting of not happy with the raining wolves do not like being wet in a non good way! grrr!



plans for this week cry for money and get out on thursday to see mio bella gattina at the box which should be fun hope its better than last time i was there

well nearly healed so will be able to do wat i always do...stand drinking or smoking but never dancing rofl. xxx

"like a banjos orgasm outmoding the older violins"

still going on

for some reason ive never any good news to put on this. its nearly always bad. i dont know what to do anymore. ive still got the jealousy and sinderella doesnt even seem to notice. i listen to her stories and get so jealous and angry but i dont say anything because it will seem clingy and possessive which isnt something i want.
ok went out to the belmont on saturday night didnt end well. got spiked and reacted badly and got a highheel driven into my knee. ah well just something else to hurt me and for me to deal with.

anyway the confusion levels are through the roof i want mio bella gattina as a friend but if that happens il end up hurting her like i always do. but i dont want to be shut out and kept in the dark. cant have it both ways i suppose.

"im stuck in a twilight dream not quite awake but never quite asleep trapped in my confusion"

like a duck fucking an oboe!

so nothing new now except for the fact ive started getting jealous and i have no clue as to why. its not good for me. as if rage and depression werent bad enough and dangerous now jealousy has been thrown into that disturbing mix. dangerous times ahead for those i dont like and for those of you that i do like please try to hold on cause this roller coaster is going of the rails with a huge bloody bang.

might not survive the weekend and if i do i might be in jail. so if i dont post after saturday you know why and im sorry. come visit me in meghberry jail sometime with soleros.....mmm soleros... quick i need a tissue! lol

i dunno now

My head is frazzled to say the least ive been drunk for the past week and cant remember the weekend at all so im worried wat i might have done. well the police havent arrested me yet so i dont think it was anything tooo bad. well ttyl away to meet mio bella gattina

"im like a spider in the bath its all shiny and clean around me but i prefer to go where its dark and dirty" :P

fucking drama!

starting off im drunk so if i dont make sense thats why. so sorry.

drama drama bloody drama its all kicked of tonight great (sarcasm in case it hasnt been noticed) ive managed to make 3 people fall out and annoy family without trying or doing anything. so bloody marvellous. anyone else get those days when you dont want to pretend anymore and hide your life from others? i hit that tonight im giving up being honest with everyone whether they like it or not.

"im coming out to play so run little rabbits run!!"

wat was i thinking???

I got crazy drunk last night i mean fucked 4 ways to the weekend! got spiked and freaked out almost ended up in a cell for a night! instead i woke up in a strange house will 12 polish people! WTF!? well me and sinderella had a bit of an argument i hope everything will sort itself out and we can go back the way we were. still expecting a letter from her! grr! better get it. anyway im never getting into the state i was in lastnight. i terrified 12 full grown men this morning....thats not good. ah well their fault for trying to kidnap me lol well ttyl.

"wake up somewhere you dont know? call the police for a free taxi and claim ;)"